Goodies to Go(tm)
January 31, 2000– Newsletter #65

Greetings, Weekend Silicon Warriors,

Did you hear…

He’s free! Super-hacker Kevin David Mitnick was released from
prison after serving since 1995 for wire fraud and illegal
possession of computer files. During his time in prison
Mitnick became a cyber-cult hero. Those who supported him
say he never meant to do harm. His actions were of a
“curious” and “recreational” interest.

Microsoft does its darndest to offer feature upon feature
when it puts out software. The problem is that all of those
features often leave big holes where people can slip in and
do harm. In response to these concerns, Microsoft announced
that Windows2000 would use 128-bit encryption while
interacting with other programs and vendors. In addition, a
24/7 hotline has been set up where users can report any
concerns.

Something happened in China that bodes well for the Web. In
the past six months, the number of people that use the Web
has jumped by 4 million, almost doubling the number of
Chinese people using the Internet.

Remember that great character from the mySimon.com
commercials this past Christmas? If you didn’t get to see it,
Simon was an animated guy who would run from store to store
looking for the best deals. Well, Simon works for C-Net now.
The company was bought for $700 million in stock. Gosh. Do
you think Simon found them that deal?

Now onto today’s topic…

You missed it, Halfway, Maryland.

When I was a radio jock in southern Pennsylvania, we use to
have a contest with the Halfway, Maryland Sheraton. On the
183rd day of the year, half way through, we would run a
contest where the audience was to listen for a half a song.
We’d play something and cut it off half way. Then you would
be the 92nd caller and win a weekend get-away in Halfway.

It was hokey, yes, but what the hey. Radio is known for
hokey contests.

When I read that a small town in Oregon had changed its name
to Half.com, all I could think was, Halfway, Maryland should
have gotten this. They already had half the name.

The Internet revolution has begun creeping into our social
conscience now to the point that not only Web sites, but
things, people, and now towns are being named with “com”
extensions.

The San Francisco 49ers play in 3Com Park.

A guy named Mitch Maddox officially changed his name to
DotComGuy.

Now, a small town in Oregon, Halfway, has officially changed
its name to Half.com.

If you’re interested is seeing the first town to receive an
extension, point your browser towards:
http://www.half.com/town/index.html. Here’s how the city
council describes the place:

“Half.com, population 360, is a picturesque community located
40 miles southwest of Hells Canyon in Eastern Oregon.
Consisting of hard-working, self-sufficient folks, the town
of Half.com is tight-knit community, full of tradition and
camaraderie. Located in scenic Pine Valley, visitors will
find a variety of outdoor activities in any season,
including backpacking, llama excursions, snowmobiling,
cross-country skiing, fishing, hunting, wild river rafting,
and more.”

Apparently this year’s Snow Festival was the best ever. I’ve
never been to a Snow Festival, so I’m going to take their
word for it.

In case you’re wonder how all of this came about, the short
answer is that it’s a marketing ploy. The site, Half.com,
sells books, movies, music, games and various other items.
It looks a lot like Amazon.com actually.

At the end of 1999, a marketing team from Half.com rolled
into Halfway Mayor Dick Crow’s office and ran an idea up the
flagpole. Let’s change the name of your town to Half.com.

I can only imagine the look Dick shot back at the team, but
he didn’t kill the idea right off and talks were underway.

The city council agreed that talks should go forward and the
media leaped. Major outlets all over the world came to
Halfway and covered the non-story that a town MIGHT change
its name.

So, what do you think its worth? What’s the monetary side of
getting a town to change the name? Here it is, straight from
the press release:

“Half.com proposed to donate 20 computers to the city for
use in the computer lab at Halfway Elementary School; a
prize to be raffled at the County Fair; and funds to be used
in civic improvement efforts.”

Of course, there’s all that media attention, plus you know
this will boost tourism.

On Wednesday, January 19th, 2000, Halfway Oregon officially
became Half.com, Oregon.

Kind of rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?

The place is just flat-out gorgeous and the people obviously
have a sense of humor. Maybe this isn’t a bad thing. You
only go round once and being the first at something is
pretty rare these days. Why not? Good for you Half.com,
Oregon.

In honor of Half.com, Oregon, I officially change my name to
Joe Burns, PhD.edu.

What about that that big river that runs through South
America? It should be named Amazon.com, shouldn’t it?

We have to find a town in Texas that will allow their name
to be changed to Yahoo.com! Doesn’t that sound like
something a computer-literate cowboy would say?

In this time of U.S. Presidential primaries, can a city in
New Hampshire change its name to WeLoveGore.com? Maybe a
town in Iowa could name itself GeorgeW.com.

There could be Forbestown.com and Bradlyville.com.

I think we’re onto something here…

Detroit, Michigan just has too many car companies to name it
Ford.com or Chevy.com. So let’s go with Motown.com. The
site could have some pretty great Mp3 files available.

Springfield, Missouri will change to Simpsons.com. (Doh!)

Cleveland, Ohio will change to DrewCarey.com.

Hollywood, California will go to AOLTimeWarner.com.

Burkittsville, Maryland will be renamed BlairWitch.com.

The entire state of Washington will be renamed Microsoft.com.

In the interest of French tourism, Paris, Illinois will be
renamed ILoveParisInTheSpringTime.com.

The planet Pluto will be renamed Disney.com.

The planet Saturn will remain Saturn, but now it’s the Car
Company rather than the Roman god of agriculture.

Can you think of any more?

It’s a new party game to which I hold all of the rights and
back-end profits. Feel free to use my idea at your next
party. Just remember to send me $50.00 every time you play.

Just kidding.com.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

That’s that. I’m looking forward to your emails about
renaming towns. I know they’re coming. Thanks again for
reading.

Joe Burns, Ph.D.edu

And Remember: Who decided that “A-1” is the best rating you
could give? Lloyd’s of London did. When the insurance
consortium was first being organized, they insured a lot of
ships and their cargo. The letter “A” stood for the best
ship. Lesser ships received a letter on down the alphabet.
The best cargo was given the number 1. Lesser cargo received
a higher letter. A ship and cargo marked “A-1” was the best
insurance risk.